Ambiguous Seductions
by Ricordi
Summary: Who knew that shopping with Fuji could be sexually frustrating? Tezuka, that's who. A response to x.lithium's challenge. Perfect Pair


**Title: Ambiguous Seductions  
Word Count: 1,879**  
**Genre: Romance/Humor  
DISCLAIMER!: I do not own Tezuka and Fuji, ****you know who they belong to..*wink*****. Nor do I own Pocky. I just eat them with ice cream.**** Glico makes them**.

(A/N: When I first read Lithium's challenge, I mistook a lamp_post_ for a lamp_shade_ (gets bricked). So with a little twist on the original plot, it became four items instead of three. And those are: lamppost, lampshade, rocking horse, and Pocky. Just like it says in the prescription.

And this is the product of my over-active head. Now I know why a lot of people like to harass Tezuka. Seriously, I had a lot of fun in this challenge. And I must warn you, this contains shounen-ai, some fetish and...well..suggestive themes. Oh, and some OOC-ness perhaps? This is the first time I've written something this, _fun_. I usually write angst. Anyway, enjoy!)

* * *

It's not everyday that Eiji Kikumaru would show up at Tezuka and Fuji's shared apartment unit. More like, once in a week. And most of the times that he visits, he finds the front door unlocked; gesturing that he should enter unannounced, only to walk in and apologize for entering the wrong house then dashing outside with a beet red face, the image of Fuji and Tezuka making out in broad sunlight recurring in his head. This time, he's lucky. The redhead found only his best friend inside, clad in an apron, cooking.

"Ohayou Fujiko!" waved Eiji from the open door.

The brunette turned around to see Eiji skipping to the dining table and reaching out for the food laid in the middle. He then stopped the redhead from eating the wasabi sushi. Sighing in relief, Eiji asked, "Where's Tezuka?"

"Oh, Kunimitsu's playing tennis. He should be back soon." Fuji wiped his hands and started cleaning the counter. "Would you like to go with us? We're going to shop later."

Eiji refused. "Sorry, I can't. I just came over to give you something. Here," he handed Fuji a red-colored box. "It's really tasty you know. And I thought you might like it. They say it helps a lot in relationships. But I don't know how it does, nya," Eiji scratched his head and bid goodbye to his best friend.

When Fuji looked at the box, he noticed the label in big, white letters. And then, he smiled.

His wily mind knew how it will help.

* * *

Of all the places in the mall, Tezuka doesn't really understand why they should go inside an appliance store. Every possible item he thinks that are needed, are already in their apartment. From kitchen sets to entertainment consoles, what more could his tensai want?

Maybe he should rethink the meaning of entertainment. Because for Fuji, the phrase 'entertainment system' goes a longer way than just TV sets and DVD players.

And he'll make sure Tezuka understood that very well. He would even bet his hormones that it will be a sweet lesson the bespectacled man would never forget.

Striding past the kitchenware, the blue-eyed genius ran towards the chandeliers. 'Decorations for a romantic dinner perhaps?' thought Tezuka. But his hopes died when Fuji ran past the crystal ornaments and settled for…a tall lampshade. He had no idea what could be the use of a lampshade for their fairly lit home.

Until his boyfriend started dancing around the item as if it was a strip pole.

Sure they have been to a few clubs. But those were with friends. And they keep good watch of each other should they go astray. Since when did Fuji picked up so much information and experience in pole dancing?

It was a relief that there were no security cameras installed or were they in an open space. No, Tezuka does not want to do Fuji right here in a far corner of the store. But his mind opposed the thought by the way his petite tensai's shoulders move, those slender legs clinging to the shaft of the lamp as if it were Tezuka's back, and those clear blue eyes. Those inviting, tempting eyes begging its sole audience to join in.

Tezuka would need more than covering his nose to prevent himself from having a nosebleed. And a blow in the head would not be enough to control him. He could feel his hand reaching for the moving body before him, his head lost in his dirty thoughts. But before he could touch the brunette's arm, a voice pulled him back to reality.

"…mitsu? Kunimitsu? Ne, were you listening to me?" Fuji asked, eyebrows scrunched with worry that Tezuka was not answering his question.

The bespectacled man stammered in his answer while trying to grasp the situation. A moment ago, this lithe man before him was trying to seduce the sanity out of him. Now, said brunette was holding some items and wearing a concerned look in his face, like nothing of the sort happened at all.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention. What was it you were trying to tell me?"

"I want to ask you if you want a candelabrum for the table. Oh," Fuji noticed Tezuka's right arm reaching in mid-air towards the lampshade; which the latter quickly withdrew. "Do you want that lampshade? You could use that since you read at night."

The taller of the two quickly refused, quite dumbfounded and embarrassed that he almost mistaken fantasy for reality. Was that a hallucination? He needed a good self-check and a breath of fresh air; which Fuji understood through his recent behavior. "Are you alright? Should we go outside?"

"Aa."

"Okay. Wait outside the store while I pay for these," the tensai referred to the items in his hands. They parted ways, Tezuka heading outside, whilst Fuji filing in line to pay at the cashier.

A whimsical chuckle escaped the brunette's lips while thinking of what happened at the lighting section of the store. _'He nearly got me there. But, there's still a long day ahead of us. Saa, Let's see what happens later,'_ thought Fuji, knowing that Tezuka cannot look at the lampshade as an innocent object ever again.

* * *

They stopped at a nearby court café to rest, mostly on Tezuka's part. He couldn't believe that what he saw earlier did_ not_ happen. He was half-surprised and; would he believe, half-disappointed. Seduction or not, it still boggled the tall man's mind to no end. He needed to recollect his cool otherwise sooner or later, he would really lose it. The things Fuji does just to have his way. Their relationship can be very tiring just from thinking of ways to get one another. But in all of their efforts, it always pays off and that's what makes their connection even stronger.

Tezuka stared at his cup of espresso for a while until something in its reflection caught his attention to look upward.

What Fuji had in his mouth could not be what he thought it was. But it was, indeed a piece of Pocky that his tensai was eating.

Inwardly, the tall man cursed _'Damn that chocolate-covered pretzel stick intruding Syuusuke's mouth'_. "Fuji, I do not remember going to the market earlier." Now that was an irrelevant statement. Anything would do at the moment so long as he doesn't snatch the tiny piece of Pocky from Fuji's mouth and kiss him right in the middle of the mall.

"This?" said Fuji while chewing the chocolate-covered pretzel. "Eiji gave it to me this morning while you were out. That reminds me, we should lock the door more frequently. It's scarring him a lot," and without a bit of Pocky gone from the brunette's mouth; he managed to speak all the way, plump lips moving awkwardly at every word uttered. He continued to chat about different things, about what tonight's dinner would be, getting his racket stringed, the US Open starting next month, how far will they hike next and, "Ne Tezuka, are you drooling?"

Tezuka would gladly say yes and ravish that quirky mouth that's been talking; unfortunately(?), control got the better of him. Wiping the bit of saliva using the napkin nearby, he felt mortified and frustrated. He had let his guard down for the second time in a day. There were other times that he had been off guard more than twice; but those were not as frustrating as this. And apparently, his boyfriend is getting the upper hand at the situation.

That was Fuji two; Tezuka none, and still dropping to negatives.

* * *

Finding that his plan had worked, the blue-eyed genius decided to move on with his next plan. He took Tezuka's hand and dragged him to a toy store. What would middle-aged men do in a kids' bazaar of toys?

"I saw something interesting when I last visited. Come, I'll show you." Truth be told, Fuji had only visited the place once, and that was with Yuuta ten years ago. As the two walked, Tezuka observed that they are going into the older wing of the enormous store. The variety of toys changed from plastics to wooden figures and dolls. "I just hope it's still there, there it is!" Fuji pointed to the far corner of the store. A wooden rocking horse?

And for the third time today, what the bespectacled man dreaded came true.

The moment Fuji came within a foot of the wooden animal, he jumped towards the horse and, well, rocked back ad forth.

If Tezuka thought earlier at the appliance store that he would almost have a nosebleed, here the entire area would be flooded with blood by now, if possible. Not again, Tezuka thought. Riding the horse seemed like child's play for Fuji, considering that the horse is stable enough for his weight. Since the rocking horse was positioned at a certain angle, it makes the brunette's shirt swish to and fro. _'Plus, it gives a nice view of the contours of his back, all the way down to how the horse's back splits his_' – STOP! Hold that thought right there.

Neither of the two said anything. They don't need to for this is a mental war.

It seems that Tezuka had stopped breathing for a moment; though his stoic face does not show it, and rendered himself on the verge of giving in to what his boyfriend wanted. And his resistance is wavering for every sway of the wooden horse.

Somebody, anybody, even _something_. He needed a distraction, and fast.

Coincidentally, somebody came and then Fuji's shenanigans would end.

He'll have to remember to be grateful to the little girl and her mother who were looking for wooden puppets, which were beside the rocking horse.

On Fuji's part, he has another item to add in his _'Things That Kunimitsu Cannot Ever Consider as Ordinary Objects'_ list.

* * *

The day finally ended, leaving a quite cheerful Fuji and a very tired Tezuka walking home. In their entire stay at the mall, they bought less than they planned to. All thanks to Fuji's attempts at seducing Tezuka; which, were deemed successful.

'_And now for the final trick,' _ mused Fuji as he suddenly climbed a lamppost and made a few twirls that were familiar to the ones he did with the lampshade, not minding that there were passers-by whistling at him, or 'her'; whichever floats their minds.

And that was enough for Tezuka to believe that Fuji did dance around the lampshade earlier.

In the deep recesses of Tezuka's brain, the devil was cheering yippee. A sudden idea of payback came to mind when the tall man discreetly picked up what fell out of Fuji's pocket from twirling on the lamppost.

When they reached the front door of the apartment, Fuji entered first, a wide grin plastered on his face. Tezuka followed, locking the door that surprised the brunette enough to face him.

Fuji could swear that he saw a smirk on Tezuka's lips; lips that were holding a stick of Pocky in between. And he took the other end to his mouth and started chewing his way toward the other's lips for a kiss.

Maybe they should do this sometime again, with more items and less restrictions.

-**missionaccomplished**-

* * *

Yep, you can kill me now, or something less grosser. Before you do, tell me first what your thoughts on this fic are. =)


End file.
